Reality of a Dream

2001-07-03T06:26:00.000-07:00

A month has passed without a word, thoughts that are lost, time wasted, such precious time.....just gone........
Have I learned anything this past month? Not really.........I just got older another year and the countdown now starts again....how much time is left I wonder?
So much work yet ahead..........if reality really be a dream I want to wake up now.
But if my dreams really should become reality, then I'd be in really big trouble.
Half the battle of success is fighting the fear of what will happen when one really succeeds, fighting the success itself...........I'm defeating my own purpose here.......I'm my biggest enemy.......not good....not good at all.......
got to meditate on that one.........

2001-05-31T02:21:00.000-07:00

it's been awhile, a long while....this puter is driving me nuts sometimes....aaaarrrrrrrggggghhhhhhhhh
Not much been happening here....too much rain, not enough love, exept from my animals....they are just so faithful, well.....as long as I feed them, anyway........come to think of it.....not much different from men, then, are they???
Soon, soon, not soon enough though, I will start a new chapter in my life, can't wait, will tell you everything about it, when the time is right. For now though, just contempt and happy with my good ol' self, for a change.
What else matters?
A breakthrough, jobwise...don't know yet if a blessing or curse, but I will make the best of it, I supose.
I've gotten really good at making lemonade over the years , if you know what I mean............
Well then, duty calls.....time to go to work again....oh what joy, what pleasure.........

2001-05-30T16:26:00.000-07:00

2001-05-23T02:38:00.000-07:00

Good morning y' all! Good to have you Morgan.
And Silver?------------>Loose your attitude! For crying out loud! I IM'd PHyllis last night, she's been really busy at work and barely gets on the puter anymore
BUt not for long and she will join us.
Hey Morgan...now I know what you meant when you said you were going BONKERS hahaha.
My computer is been messing up on me here lately, not for long and I'll be off line for a while--------mainly because I will be taking a sledge hammer to this damn thing-------------
other than that, since I obiously woke up today I should be getting another chance to dream up a new reality.
something is a-brewing in my pot o'dreams, hanging over the fire o'reality.
Let's see what I can cook up today!
Love you all,

2001-05-22T04:04:00.000-07:00

Hi Silver, I am Morgan, Yes Maria's friend. She invited me here. I am trying to figure you out, What is it about you that makes me wonder?and you are forgiven for yelling at me. I think I will enjoy this, talking with you and others here. Now wait until you meet PHYLLIS, she is a trip......She definatly fits her nickname of the ALIEN........just wait...I wonder where she has been? Maria have you talked to Phyllis? Well a little about myself. I am an aspiring writer. I have been writing for years. nothing published yet. I am single and I have my best friend living with me......my cat, BONKERS. He is my best friend. (except when he coughs up a fir ball, argh) He understands me and the pain and suffering I have been through. But enough about me! What about you Silver? Tell me you really don't know me? What is your story????

2001-05-21T19:55:00.000-07:00

Well then....don't know how it went for you, Maria........I, myself couldn't quite get a grip on reality and with nothing to hold on to I couldn't turn it into a dream......ahem....I mean the other way around......either way, it just didn't work out......GET IT?
Hi Morgan! Who the Hell is Phyllis? and..............come to think of it :WHO THE HELL are YOU????
Maria must have inited you...sorry didn't mean to yell, it's just today is ,was one of thoooooooose days again, nothing worked out at work, the guy I like is not interested, the guy my friend says would be perfect doesn't bother to answer his mail....aaah to hell with them all.
Actually I really start to hate him, just another jerk, anyway.
Time to hit the sack, so I'll be fresh and wide awake before reality hits me smack between the eyes again tomorrow hahahaaha-------->hysterical laughter---------

2001-05-21T03:53:00.000-07:00

Hello there. It is me Morgan...I don't know where Phyllis is at. Last I heard she was taking a leave of absence from the world....the alien that she is. Have a wonderful day. I will check back later. Maria try calling Phyllis tonight and see if she is alive will you? I miss seeing her on-line.

2001-05-21T02:49:00.000-07:00

Another day, another chance to turn a dream into reality.
Wether or not I will succeed............that's still to be seen.
Sometimes , though I have the feeling, it's more scary to actually achieve what I set out to do.Why?
No matter what the subject.....work, love, relationships, anything........
Be careful what you wish for......is ever more so true than before.
But, oh, I almost forgot...I don't worry anymore. What ever happens happens, and usually for a reason, at that.
Better get going now, living a dream...........or was it Dreaming a life?

2001-05-20T08:17:00.000-07:00

My, my, Silver you ought to write a book......what's with the misery here lately, I thought things are looking up for you? I mean....look how far you've come in a years worth of time!!!
I know you lost a lot of "stuff" but you gained your life! You can be yourself again!!!
Unless you forgot how. You'll make it, you always did, otherwise you wouldn't be here right now, now would you?
I know you: you are quite bullheaded, straightforward and once you figure out what you really want, there's no stopping you, come hell or high water!
Oh, hi! Morgan! Where is Phyllis? I thought she got an invite too?
So many aliens on one page, this site is bound to crash eventually, hahaha.
Well, got to go get some chores done, Sunday or not, lets see what dream we can make come true today.........

2001-05-18T20:08:00.000-07:00

reality within a dream,
or is it the other way around?
sometimes the difference is
not at all so profound.
one will turn into the other
and back again.
confused and in doubt,
which one is what and when.
I don't want to dream,
nor want it to be all real.
with no dream,
there is no hope.
so, it's with reality
that I have to cope.

2001-05-18T19:37:00.000-07:00

me again Silver. Surprised that you haven't been on today.
Just got home from work, thought I'd catch you online. Was real busy today, I'm beat, had to put umpteen appliances in stock..........them suckers get heavy after a while. Had some really nice customers as well, no complainers or bitchy ones, that helped tremendously. HE seemed to have been in hiding for the better part of the day...........aahhhhhhhh what the hell, he's probably just another jerk anyway.....but damn goodlooking, though
Go figure......oh well, I'll be hanging out a bit and see if you still show up.
later

2001-05-18T09:24:00.000-07:00

Hi Silver! Good to hear from you, it's been awhile.Work is good, quit that second job a week ago. I get much more sleep now!!!! Jen sais I'm not nearly as cranky as before.........lol...teenagers.......
Love of my life????I gave up on that since the last miserable episode. If THAT was love, I certainly don't need any of it.
Seems like I'm loosing my touch....then again, seems like I never had it...just can't pick 'em. So be it.
I'm still hoping for that promotion...they have not decided yet.........I'm eager to find out. If I don't get it I might have to look for another parttime job again. Realy don't want to thouhg, tired of working 70-80 hours a week, gets old after a while.
Oh before I forget, I know of a few people you might want to invite, if you please, it'll be fun.
Well, off to work I go now. I will post tonight if something exiting has happened.
Wonder if HE is working today............heh.....a girl can dream, now can she?

2001-05-17T17:01:00.000-07:00

How I miss the country side....where sheep and cows mow the gras, not those loud monstrums of civilization...can't even take a nap!
What is it with this obssecion about short grass and manicured lawn? Goodness, give it a few inches at least.......
not that size matters.....well to a point anyways.
Good to have you with us Maria, hope you enjoy this site and let your thoughts reign the keyboard.
How's work? Did you find the love of your life yet?

2001-05-17T02:40:00.000-07:00

Gee, thanks for the invite......this will be interesting, indeed.Got to go to work now though, just stopped by to check it out.

2001-05-17T02:32:00.000-07:00

Reality has become a lie.
So many of us fake their happiness so well, they don't even realize what's true anymore.
Equally, so many people fall into depression and simply give up.
But I refuse to give in.
Dream or reality, I will not blame anybody or anything else for my state of mind.
Get over it, get on with it, don't be such a whimp.
Everybody is responsible for their own happiness.
I'm tired of listening to all those excuse of Why and Why not.
Everything does happen for a reason, yet each one of us is responsible for their own actions, no matter what.
Depressed?........Snap out of it!!!!!!
Think it's not YOUR fault?..........Think again because YOU and YOU alone are in charge of your own destiny.
Wether or not you make the right choice...live with it, deal with the consequenses.
That's life..........take charge...and for heavens sake................................
Quit whinning!!!

2001-05-16T17:46:00.000-07:00

What if..........
what if all this is just a dream?
what if nothing is real at all?
what if our existence is just a part of someones imagination?
what if someone stops imagining, wakes up?
How would we know?
Do I really want my dream to be real?
Do I want my reality to be just a dream?
How will I ever know?

I'll have to meditate on that.